Me, You, Her and the Walls
by theatricalice
Summary: Link, Penny, Seaweed, a birthday present to hide, a deserted studio, and a closet with a broken lock. Apologies for the title and summary. Nothing naughty, by the way, it's T for language only.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I'm not sure whether this is good or not, because I've never done a dialogue only story.**

**But if you like it, awesome, if you don't, tell me why.**

**I am working on my other stories, but this is fun. ******

**It's going to be really short, but please review? **

"Why did we offer to help you again, Larkin?"

"You guys said you'd help me hide Tracy's birthday present!"

"Her birthday's in two months, cracker boy and if y-HOLY CRAP!"

"What?!"

"MY TOE! Thanks a lot, now I can't dance for two weeks."

"Golly gee, Link, this weighs a ton!"

"….Golly gee?"

"Oh stop laughing, it's bred into me not to swear…STOP LAUGHING!"

"Okay, okay. Well, Corny said we could hide it anywhere, so how about in that closet."

"Right then. Seaweed, just drag it through the door."

"Slowly! This cost a fortune!"

"I think you mentioned that, about eighty times."

"Boys, stop arguing! We're nearly done!"

"Lower it, slowly, gently….okay….drop."

"Seaweed!"

"I said drop it _gently_!"

"Well if you have so much money cracker, you can just buy a new one!"

"Can you please stop fighting?!"

"He started it!"

"I don't care who started it, it's..."

_**BANG.**_

"Shit."

"Shit."

"Golly ge…uh…shit."


	2. Chapter 2

"HELP! HEEELP!"

"Link, stop that. You'll hurt your arms!"

"If you don't mind, I'm trying to get us out of here."

"Not with those puny biceps."

"For goodness sake, Seaweed…LINK! GET OFF HIM! Look, everybody, just calm down, we'll find a way out of this. Tracy should be here soon."

"Oh, thank God."

"Too bad cracker, Tracy's out of town with her parents for the weekend."

"Well, what about…"

"Corny went to the National Salsa Dancing Convention with Mama."

"How can you joke at a time like this?!"

"No joke."

"…Corny salsa dances?"

"He _thinks _he can."

**THREE HOURS LATER.**

"Jesus, Larkin, will you stop pacing? It's driving me nuts!"

"Do you have an audition tonight?! For Broadway?! _Has every single ounce of your sweat, blood and tears been working up to this fucking moment?!_"

"You gotta calm down!"

"That's damn well easy for you to say! Well, don't come crying to me when you're working the drive through at Chunky Cheese in ten years!"

"Okay, cracker boy, bring it on!"

"For heavens sake you two! I'm trying to sleep! Can't you go five minutes without arguing?"

"He started it!"

"No he did!"

"Oh, not this again."

**ANOTHER HOUR LATER.**

"God, you two, will you stop sucking face?"

"Oh, you're just jealous, candyass."

"Sorry Seaweed, you're not my type."

"Oh shut up. Now, anyway baby, where were we?"

"ARGHHHHH!"

_Thump._

"Link, what the hell was that all about?"

"I want to get the fuck out of here!"

"By throwing yourself against a door?"

"It's my audition in about…twenty five minutes!"

"Cracker, calm down."

"I AM CALM! I'M THE ABSOLUTE ESSENCE OF CALM! NOW SHUT THE HELL UP BEFORE I THROW YOU INTO THE WALL!"

"Jeez, stop getting so stressed!"

"GODDAMMIT SEAWEED, I AM NOT STRESSED!"


	3. Chapter 3

**LATER ON THAT NIGHT:**

"My future is ruined. Tracy will leave me, and I'll die alone with seventeen cats."

"Oh Link, don't worry. It's just one audition. Maybe they'll give you another chance."

"Or maybe he'll end up living in a tree, and all the kids will try and avoid 'Crazy Old Linkie'."

"_Seaweed!_ Don't encourage him!"

"But it's fun! And we shouldn't get his hopes up. Maybe old cracker will die alone."

"No he won't! And even if Tracy was to leave him, he's kind, funny, and handsome…oh don't look at me like that Seaweed, I'm only saying it to make Link feel better."

"So you _don't _think I'm kind, funny, and very, very handsome?"

"No, I do!"

"Eyes off my prize, cracker!"

"Seaweed! Anyway, I said handsome, not very, very handsome."

"Sorry Penny, but I always tell the truth."

"Yeah, you keep believing that Larkin."

"Excuse me?!"

"Nothing…"

**THE NEXT MORNING: **

"_Link? Penny? Seaweed?"_

"Holy shit! Pen, wake up, it's Tracy!"

"Tracy! Quick, let us out! My mother's going to kill me!"

"And cracker's practically chewing the walls!"

"_Link! Is that you? I'll get you out soon, I love you!"_

"Love you too, darlin'!"

"Link Larkin, are you kissing the wall?"

"Uh…no…"

_**The End.**_

**So, there's my strange, silly, and slightly crappy short story.**

**I hope you liked it, and please check out my other stories!**

**Or you could press the pretty little greyish button, and chuck a review my way!**

**I'll give you Link Winks!**

**Over and out, Hairspray Nerds!**

**Alice**

**Jupiter Spoon**


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